MMM

I feel a little bad about posting this, since it's apparently not the finalized version, but then again fuck it. I don't feel like waiting another week and a half and neither do you. So here it is in all it's glory:

Stewie Kills Lois

-found at sidereel

This is about Gulf War 1, just so you know, curiously free of any military imagery:


I don't see how growing up in that bastion of mediocrity that was the late 80s/early 90s could fail to mess you up in the head a little. I remember watching shit like this as a kid and knowing that something wasn't quite right, but lacking any way of knowing what right was. I can watch We Are The World as something mildly humorous, since my memory is from when I was 5, very vague. But Voices That Care just kind of makes me uncomfortable. Please Movie/Rock/Pop Stars, don't ever do anything like this again, please?

Hell fucking yes. Yeah, it'll probably suck. But it could be good. It could... If they put some money into it and got some good writers and actors, it could rock. I mean 24 shouldn't have been good and it is, despite the torture. In my fantasy The Sarah Connor Chronicles becomes an awesome new serial drama and Terminator 3 never happened.

Oh yeah and this is the chick playing Sarah Connor:

Just waited for 20 minutes on an A-train at Broadway-Nassau. The train sat there, more and more people squeezing on, the subway doors continuously beginning to close and then snapping back suddenly. It wasn't exactly rhythmic, but it had a certain obscene quality to it, like a turtle head nervously poking out - or the colloquial bathroom analogy that refers to this.
This is not the first time I've thought of routine subway experiences in terms of bowel metaphors. The experience of a flood of commuters spilling out of a freshly-opened pair of subway doors has always reminded me of an exhaustively liberating bowel movement. The train feels lighter. You have an indistinct feeling of freedom, as if the train would never fill up to same degree it just was.
I'm listening to a British singer called Bat For Lashes. Her new album, titled Fur & Gold, is getting very good reviews. What caught my eye was the routine comparison of her to Kate Bush, someone with whose music I have a near-unhealthy obsession.
Her music is really interesting - vocally she is similar to Kate Bush and Bjork, but steers clear of absorbing the influence in a way that manifests itself to obviously. Like Kate, and a growing number of British female singers such as Lily Allen, she proudly sings in her native accent, but displays a vocal versatility so that she doesn't rely on this as schtick.
Stylistically, the music is very diverse. It delves into styles as varied as Petula Clark-ish 60s britpop in What's a Girl to Do?, to industrial in Trophy, and into creepy downtempo surf rock in Sarah that seems right out of Blue Velvet. Oh yeah, and there is a bunch of harpsichord, like a lot.
What separates her the most from those esteemed musicians with whom she is often compared is her lyrics. Let me put it this way: I enjoy the music best when I don't think about the lyrics. I mean, they're not Ashley Simpson-bad, but they seem at worst the type you would see scrawled in a angst-oppressed middle-schooler's journal and at best from the lyrics sheet of a middle-ages-obsessed 70s British progger.
Here's an example of the former, from I Saw a Light:

The light gave me life
Helped me see more clearly
And the children went to sleep
And the car was towed away
And the leaves were rustling
As the night turned to day

And of the latter, from Trophy:

The queens and the court jesters
Clapped, adored
Their hearts swelled to overdrive a
Mercy sword
Mercy this and mercy that
Let justice prevail
But if just want my trophy back
It's not for sale

I'd be lying if I said the lyrics didn't get in the way. Every once in a while I'm like: Damn girl, you're my age! Why do you write lyrics like a 13 year old boy?
My advice would be for her to simplify her lyrics, stop trying to be profound and just focus on what sits well on her tongue, but of course this is coming from a song-writer whose songs usually consist of one sentence.

The easiest type of admission or revelation happens after the fact. Oh, btw I was on steroids, now that I already have the medal, Read my lips: no new taxes, etc. How much of a cultural milestone should it be that J.K. Rowling has retroactively made one of her major characters a homosexual? To me it seems too easy, and rather manipulative. Sure, you are the author, why not say that Harry had AIDS, Hermoine had a secret abortion, Ron often thought about the effects of Global Warming? These are modern hot button issues that, if tackled, give some instant credibility to the author. In fact the reason I never got into the series (well, past the first book) was that it seemed essentially a safe, well-written children's book, nothing to challenge my preconceived notions about society.

John Cloud puts it well:

Why couldn't he tell us himself? The Potter books add up to more than 800,000 words before Dumbledore dies in Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince, and yet Rowling couldn't spare two of those words—"I'm gay"—to help define a central character's emotional identity? We can only conclude that Dumbledore saw his homosexuality as shameful and inappropriate to mention among his colleagues and students. His silence suggests a lack of personal integrity that is completely out of character.

I don't know why this should be applauded. Yes, it's nice to have a major contemporary fictional figure who is gay, but I wish he were not so ashamed of it.

Although I talk a lot of shit about the left, they'll still never be the fire-breathing assholes the Republicans are. Jesus, they seem to get off on un-gentlemen-like behavior at these debates. Have a degree of fucking honor, dayamn! They gnash their teeth like kids on a playground. I'm not a Hillary fan either, but speak about substance! My favorite of the bunch, Ron Paul, said it best:

"I think they're bored, and they're not discussing issues, so they have to come up with all this political stuff," he said.

Paul characterized Clinton as "an easy target."

"They're using her to try to enhance themselves with the base," he said.

If only he had a shred of a chance of even being nominated...

One of the best things I like about Obama is that he steers clear of these tactics, he'll give his opinion when asked, but he doesn't seem to thrive on it.

Hillary's momentum is scary. Aside from the fact that I would not want her to become president, polls are showing her to be one of the Democrats least likely to beat the Republican nominee.

There are two types of exotic foods, in my opinion: the type that stress your taste buds and the type that stress your brain. This is the latter. To be honest that video freaks me out, how the fish is still breathing while its body is sliced up and being eaten. It's like something out of a horror movie. Yuck. I don't know if I'd be able to do it. I mean I could, I just couldn't let myself think about it, which I suppose is the way you handle any exotic food. I just don't know if I want that kind of detachment.
-via Neatorama

Wow, I just came across this site. I can't tell if it is more infuriating or more hilarious. I'll probably settle with infuriating, since every sensible guy has, as some point in his life, despaired on some beautiful girl's unbelievably bad choice in men. The guy who runs the site really seems to have made an art of Hot Chick with Douchebag appreciation. Just in case you were wondering, here is an accurate visual definition of a douchebag.

Here's his comparison of two of his favorite pictures, The Ab Lobster and Fish Slap:

Unbelievable. He's like the T-1000 of douchebaggery. He will not stop... until we are 'bagged.

But taking down the mighty Lobster? I didn't think it could be done. After all, pointing. At. His. Abs.

And yet the eyebrow shaving, the hat tilt, the affect on next-generation douche like Minnow Slap in pic #2, the power of the hottie and the douche-chin were too much for even the wily crustacean to overcome.

Really everything a good blog should be, it's focused, entertaining, and hilariously passionate. Kinda depressing though.

Funny how all the guys look like they're from Long Island...

Choose one:

I hate

(A) Activists


(B) Hipsters


(C) Yuppies


(D) Hippies


most of all.

I can't decide. Feel free to vote yourself in my comments.

Now, I guess I would still consider myself more to the left than to the right politically. But it's becoming more and more apparent that I dislike the people on the left more than on the right. They (we?) just tend to be so much more smug, annoying, and self-righteous. And of course, despite their best efforts, they embody the spirit of conformity more than any TV-suckling red-stater. Nowhere is this more apparent than in NYC, where you see the cookie-cutter pattern they all fit into every single day embodied in around 100 people each. Uf! I know I'm being dark, but these are the people with whom I'm supposed to be voting along? Fuck. That.

If this was my reaction every time porn showed up on the screen of my computer... it'd be like a Silicon Valley apocalypse in my apartment.

The death of tv-links.co.uk?? Let's hope not. TV Links has long been my favored link website for TV episodes and movies (their growing music video library wasn't bad either...). Now it turns out that the proprietor has been arrested. I really can't imagine what they could charge him with, but you never know with British law...

TV Links, as per the name, only posts links to sites, such as YouTube, Stage 6 (my fave in terms of quality), and Veoh. TV Links does not upload content. As the blogger relaying the story notes, charging someone for linking to copyrighted material "effectively makes the entire internet illegal".

In the meantime, you can find your online TV fix at other good link websites, such as alluc, sidereel, and of course Online Video Guide, which searches a long list of link sites.

I'm going to join in TNF's protest and post a link to copyrighted material right now (wouldn't be the first time...)

Pushing Daisies - 1st Episode

Good Show.

PS. Oh, just reading the update, apparently there is talk of organized crime charges. WTF??

10 Films That Couldn't Have Happened Without Wes Anderson. Coincidentally, almost all of these movies annoy me in the same way as Wes Anderson's movies. Little Miss Sunshine is probably my favorite, although it was a little too cute. The dicrepid pile of pretentious triteness that was Garden State is definitely my least favorite. That was one of the few movies that depreciated over time with me. I liked it less and less the more I thought about it.

Poll: Bullshit Is Most Important Issue For 2008 Voters

I saw this sign in a Greyhound bus restroom. Ordered emasculation. I like that.

I love this joke. It is the essence of Family Guy humor.

Sneakers O'Toole

Add to My Profile | More Videos

Seriously, I think he should run. Just as Hillary is pulling ahead in the polls and it seems like it's about to become business as usual, a major farcical candidate could be just what this country needs. If it ends up being a Rudy vs Hillary ticket, I'm out. There is no hope. I will gladly support absurdism, no matter how silly and unpatriotic it becomes. If Colbert can actually make it into debates and prove to be a mock, disruptive candidate alongside other candidates (that just appear that way), then we have truly entered into a golden age of irony and sarcasm. Fuck being serious. Dada bitch, dada.


via videosift.com

Sure, it's not all that useful, but the geek in me wants one!!

Arrrrrrrrrr!!!!!!

Teresa Brewer, who sang the with-lyrics version of the official Catchiest Song Ever, Spanish Flea, died yesterday. Don't know much about her, but girl sang a mean Flea!

Wow. Leopard Mail looks like it's going to give Google a run for its money. I love my Gmail and Google Reader, but this looks amazing. Stationary? RSS feeds? Jesus.

Awesomely awkward Sigur Ros interview". The interviewer wasn't really asking the right questions, but they certainly did not make it easy on him.

Hey. News flash. When you make it incredibly easy for idiots to fuck with shit, idiots will fuck with shit. I mean, I completely understand being offended by a hung noose, that shit is fucked up. Everything it represents from lynchings to capital punishment is horrible. But do you know how easy it is to hang a noose? Boop! Just like that. Just scared and offended millions of people. If you give assholes that kind of power then they will inevitably use it.

There seems to be this paranoid fear that all of these nooses are heralding some new white supremacist movement or something. Is crazy-ass racism present in America? Hell yeah it is, more than people (especially white people) want to admit. But all it takes to throw up a few nooses and draw some graffiti is ONE PERSON: one simple-minded, bored, racist anus-face.

I've never understood the idea of giving so much power to a word, symbol or gesture. Curse-words, flaming crosses, and middle fingers just hold no weight with me. You could throw these at me till the cows come home and I would just look at you blankly. Of course, this is easy to say as a white-ish male in society. But I always come back to the Lenny Bruce argument: the fear and reverence given to these symbols and words is what gives them power.

Beautiful. This makes Radiohead, NIN, Oasis, Jamiroquai, and now Madonna the list of former major-labellers who have now dumped the Record Industry. That's what you get for suing kids assholes! They are fast becoming as obsolete as the Walkman and is there ever an industry that deserves it...

Ok. I was a doubter. I worried about the future of the funniest show on television. Then this last Sunday's episode came on. Hell yes. What I should have realized is that the one before this was a Brian episode. They tend to be, like his personality, more serious and somewhat romantic, ever since Season One's Brian in Love.
This last episode, titled Believe it or not, Joe's walking on air is the sort of episode that tends to have the widest appeal, and surely leaves me in helpless fits of laughter. The use of self-referential/deprecating humor was conspicuous in this episode, with the writers poking fun at criticisms leveled against them by South Park, among others. Once could view these responses either as acts of self-consciousness or as humorous means of transcendence. I tend to be optimistic about it. I was laughing my ass off, so I approve.

In other humor news. I have always been a fan of slapstick movies, unrealistic comedies such as Airplane, Naked Gun, even the Hot Shots movies made me laugh. Maybe it's because I'm getting older, but the newest movie to emerge from the genre, The Comebacks, just looks awful. It could be because I'm just generally not a sports fan, but come on, one scene shows referees with dark glasses and canes. Oh! I get it they're blind! A-he he... It could be just my growing older, I wasn't particularly thrilled with the Scary Movie series, I just generally think the two young Wayans brothers are about as funny as a tube of Metemucil. No, actually Metemucil at times can be quite hilarious. I actually think David Koechner was pretty funny in SNL, Anchorman, and The Office, but I will sit this one out.

Cracked has really reinvented itself in a great way, from the blatant MAD Magazine knockoff, to an online humor website that is actually smart and funny, while being informative (read a MAD recently? not much of any of these things...).
Today's article is The 6 Most Terrifying Foods in the World. Anyone who knows me, or read my recent Bull Penis post, knows of my, shall we say, penchant for eating exotic foods. This list though, Jesus. Most of these I have never heard of, though I am proud to say that I have eaten a minor variation of one of them: the Iraqi boiled sheep's head - last year I ate a boiled goat's head at Greek diner in Astoria. Another one, the Filipino half-incubated duck eggs I saw on Fear Factor once. By far the most disgusting one, though it's only listed as number 5, is Casu Marzu:

Casu Marzu is a sheep’s milk cheese that has been deliberately infested by a Piophila casei, the "cheese fly." The result is a maggot-ridden, weeping stink bomb in an advanced state of decomposition.

Its translucent larvae are able to jump about 6 inches into the air, making this the only cheese that requires eye protection while eating. The taste is strong enough to burn the tongue, and the larvae themselves pass through the stomach undigested, sometimes surviving long enough to breed in the intestine, where they attempt to bore through the walls, causing vomiting and bloody diarrhea

Eek. I am still creeped out by the eating of bugs. In fact, bugs in general have always creeped me the hell out. Although I did eat ants with Adam Shipman once in middle school...

Just bought the new Radiohead album In Rainbows. Paid 5 pounds. The site is moving at a snail's pace, they must be seriously stressed with people buying the album.

I'm giving the album a first listen. Writing down my reaction to each track.

Here we go:

1. 15 Step - A very bright opening for a Radiohead album. The track is in 5 (or 10 depending on your philosophy...). It starts out with a reverby 808 clap and beat-sliced high-frequency drums. The track get progressively more analog, so to speak. More realistic drums are introduced, then a pretty straight-forward electric guitar, then driving bass. Settles into a nice groove, if it does get a little "groove"y if you know what I mean.

2. Bodysnatchers - Fuzzed out guitar and bass begin this track. This track could seriously be at home in The Bends. Still upbeat, could this be an uplifting Radiohead album? Yorke's vocals are, as usual, obscured, so he could be singing about suicide for all I know. But it definitely sounds more positive than Hail to the Thief. Striking though, is the similarity of the first two tracks to Kid A, with the intro electronica-influenced track followed by the rock-out second jam.

3. Nude - Very unique, unsettling intro. Lots of effects at the beginning, eventually settling into a really nice tune, relying mainly on simple guitar, bass, drums, and reverb soaked vocals. Gets a little ethereal towards the B section, but the effects seem to be hardware-produced, which is a nice change. Nigel Godrich you demon you, this track is so clean, an early favorite.

4. Weird Fishes/Arpeggi - Starts with a drum sample-style breakbeat. In fact it's so clean, I might just take it... I think it is safe to say at this point that this album will be considered one of their "guitar-heavy" albums. Harmonically, this song is very beautiful, expansive and patience, the chord changes are unexpected and very welcome. Still uplifting, although Yorke described the album as "terrifying". Aww he's just afraid of be called a big softy.

5. All I Need - 2nd in a row with an opening drum solo, although this one has an ambient background. Most notably absent in this album seems to be the lack of memorable melodies and lyrics. This is usually a doomsday sign for bands in their later years, but this album is so far making up for it with excellent production and arrangements. But I have to wonder: it really is a pleasure to hear on my nice headphones, but would I want to listen to it on my laptop speakers or crappy iPod headphones, like so many people inevitably will? I wonder if the beauty and subtlety of the tracks will be lost in those formats.

6. Faust Arp - First acoustic guitar-based song on the album. Wow, kind of Beatles-influenced, with accompanying string (synth?) counter-melody. The guitars' chord progression really reminds me of Mother Nature's Son from The White Album.

7. Reckoner - Jesus, this one opens with a loud drum solo. Ouwey. Followed by electric guitar picking (noticing a trend?). The album is now starting to solidify in how Yorke described it ("almost embarrassingly minimal"). Hopefully the almost is a big almost - I think it is. Reckoner develops into a nice, lush orchestral section in the middle, with some really nice multi-tracked Thoms. This is shaping up to be a brilliant background music album. A great soundtrack to listen to as you walk down the street in fall, or to put on in your bedroom just before gettin "amorous".

8. House Of Cards - Ouch. The 160 bitrate is painfully noticeable in the opening guitar solo in this track. At first I though it might be amp distortion, but I know that sound! This is maybe the track most influenced by post-rock, although it sounds unlike any post-rock song I have ever heard. Reverb might as well be listed as a fifth instrument hear, as it is covering every single sound we hear. It's a pretty little song, ironically maybe the most memorable, and also the most sparse and hypnotic.

9. Jigsaw Falling Into Place - Starts off sounding like an acoustic 2 + 2 = 5, but then taking a left turn into obscureness with Yorke's trademark howls. But then a clear, present version of his voice comes in with the melody, his most clear lyrics yet on this album: "Just as you take my hand...". The song, like many others, is tight and neat, developing into a nice stringy jam towards the end. A good amount of strings on this album.

10. Videotape - Wow. I couldn't really write during that one. By far the most hypnotic song on the album. A four note piano sostenuto (with a very, very minor variation) rides over the entire song, Yorke mumbling characteristically throughout the song, a picked bass on every quarter-note, and an extremely limited drum part (with its phased, effected counterpart in the left channel). Towards the end, the song seems to make an attempt to break out of its hypnotic prison but never manages to, this could be the "terrifying" thing Yorke was talking about - it is kind of frightening.


This is definitely a unique Radiohead album, no doubt about it. It will never be as widely hailed as OK Computer or Kid A, I feel pretty sure of that. It will not be a major cultural milestone as those albums were and it doesn't seek to be. It is just a nice, chill album to listen to. It is the type of album you will find in your iTunes, a couple years from now and think, "Wow, this is a really great album. Why didn't I listen to it more?". Why? Because it's not here to thrill, it not here to make an impression. It's as thematically shoe-gaze as it is musically. It is here to exist as an album of good music.

Now, that said, it may not bode well for the future of Radiohead. Pretty much all rock stars settle into a comfortable style and end up sticking with it till the bitter end - usually with less than exciting results. Instrumentally, Radiohead is looking to their past - I'd say somewhere in between The Bends and OK Computer. The music, production, and style is all forward-looking, but they are actively keeping it guitar, bass, drums, and voice. The electronics and ambient pad sounds are used much more sparingly than in past albums. They do wonderful things with these instruments, but the music that results will not get you jumping around the apartment. It will however, put a smile (melancholic or not) on your face. Just as with Hail to the Thief I am thinking, "Now I really want to hear what they will do next...".

It is definitely the type of album that certain people will claim as their favorite, just because how understated it is. It's not my favorite. I think OK Computer will forever be that, likely because it is the first one I heard. This is a delightfully strange album though, in a way that isn't readily apparent. I look forward to listening to it on different speakers and headphones and seeing how I feel about it. Personally, most striking is Godrich's production. Radiohead should do what The Beatles never had the balls to do. Invite their producer to be a member of the band. He is perhaps the one contributing the most.

Tragedy hits a small Wisconsin town. Typical mass murder style: guy goes apeshit, kills a bunch of people for no apparent reason. Crazy shit, happens a lot in this country for some reason.

Here's what bothered me. CNN.com's video link, titled:

Watch the victim's mom describe her grief

They're really just cutting to the chase now. No "watch the impact on family and friends", no "watch the family's reaction", just sit back and "watch the victim's mom describe her grief".

That's all we really want right? Just give us a taste of the tragedy. Let us experience some vicarious grief and horror. That's why we watch the news, right?

I can't bring myself to click that link. It's tempting though.

Google Reader, which has become a daily routine for me, has just come out of Google Labs (which is G-speak for Beta). I can't tell you how much of a Reader slave I have become. It essentially collects and stores all of your RSS feeds in one place, thereby saving you the need of checking every single blog and website manually for updates. You simply subscribe to each feed and Reader keeps them all in one place. I have a good amount of blogs and stuff in there, so every day I have between 100-200 new posts that I sift through. It can often be a info glut at times, but using the key commands and maintaining a discriminatory perspective on the mass of info is necessary. I am the type of person who needs to feel current with the times so it is a nice alternative to sifting through numerous websites, and their numerous ads.

Also emerging from Labs is GOOG 411, which is an awesome alternative to the traditional paid 411 bullshit.


I really dig the map feature. Having Google Maps on my phone has seriously changed my life.

Oh Google Masters please enslave the planet with your superiors ideas!

Pushing Daisies seems promising. I caught the first episode, although I was actually kind of half-watching it. It's a cute little fantasy, with a good amount of dark humor - it reminds me of some of Roald Dahl's children's stories. The premise is pretty creative and quirky, could be tough to sustain a few seasons though: a man has the power to bring people back to life by touching them, if he touches them again they die forever, and if he doesn't touch them in 2 minutes then someone nearby dies to keep the balance or something but the second-touch thing still applies. So of course a highly desirable, hot, cool chick dies and he brings her back to life, but of course he can't touch her or else she dies. Quite a pickle.

Reaper is getting really good reviews but I honestly wasn't too into it. The trend this season seems to be quirky dramas, which I suppose is a nice alternative to the continual onslaught of cop, hospital, and court dramas. For example, Reaper is about a young guy who is contracted by Satan (played by Twin Peaks' Ray Wise to hunt down denizens of hell who have escaped. It's essentially a comedy and there were a few funny moments in it, but right now it seems a little, um... CW-ey if you know what I mean (although, 2 Family Guys every weekday? Nice, CW!).

Chuck is also getting a lot of accolades but to be honest, it just seems corny as hell, I don't think I'll find time to watch it.

I half-watched an episode of Dirty Sexy Money and it was good kind of in the same way that Desperate Housewives is good. The writing, acting, and cinematography is good, but I just don't want to spend an hour watching rich assholes, no matter how clever it is.

To be honest, it's getting really hard having to wait until February until Lost and BSG come out. This season is promising, but I want my shows!

Oh yeah! 30 Rock's season premier was hilarious!!

Maybe it's because I've never really been big on sports, but I could care less about the steroid scandals!!! Seriously, what is the difference between taking a shot that aids muscle growth and working out on a machine? They're both fucking unnatural! If it makes them play better baseball, track and field, early music, etc why the hell should it matter?? Freakball baby!! I wanna see hulking mass-men crushing baseball bats in their bare hands, veiny 7-foot-tall freaks with tiny nuts crushing the skulls of other freaks by throwing basketballs directly at their heads, neighing horse-women snapping calf-tendons at 25 mph leading to the mass-pile-up of 8 other equestrianite steroid atrocities.
I've long been a proponent of steroids in sports, I mean they are fighting a losing battle. Let Marion Jones keep the medals. Let Barry Bonds keep the needles and continue bashing little white balls into the heaven with the fierceness of a fucking supernova.

Btw, I'll eventually have a more detailed description of my feelings on steroids in sports (I actually do believe what I just wrote). It's something I've been working on in my mind for a while. Stay posted.

If I didn't have a glimmer of hope that Obama might actually be the real thing, the flag pin controversy would be my kind of scandal. It seems almost like a dadaist prank someone secretly pulled on the candidates, making sure they all would have to wear flag pins from now until the day they die. Unfortunately, I may be naive but I think Obama could actually make a good president. My cynicism is screaming in the back of my head to wise up, especially given his less than enlightened gay marriage stance, but I am suspending my disbelief - he at least seems unwilling to engage in attack politicking, unlike his fellow candidates.
Please Jesus just don't let the candidate be Hillary. Anyone, Edwards included, who would be willing to vote to give the president authorization to go to war, when it was SO obvious that the case was bullshit, will never get my vote, ever. I hate to say that unless Obama gets the nomination I will not vote, but I can't imagine voting for anyone else. I don't even agree with a number of his policies, he just actually seems to be somewhat honest, strong, and principled. I don't know if I've seen a politician like that in my lifetime.

Beautifully symbolic gesture from the greatest band in the world, not to mention a shrewd business decision. The days of paying for mp3s is fast coming to a close and the smart musicians are accelerating this sweet little apocalypse (Pssst!! Look to your left! Free Music!!!). Radiohead's new album, free from their record contract, is going to be available for a name-your-own-price kinda deal (aside from a small processing fee). Sure, there will be people who decide to pay nothing, but that is where the art comes into this. Radiohead is posing the question to their fans: How much is our music worth to you? If I compare OK Computer's positive effect on my life in terms of the price of a beer in Manhattan then it is worth hundreds of dollars, because it has meant so much more to me than the collective buzzes I received from those beers did (Confusing? I know. It makes sense in my mind. I tend to quantify the importance of buying various things based on the exorbitant cost of beer at Manhattan bars. This book is 10 bucks? Well, I'll spend more on two beers at the drop of a hat when I'm out drinking so I guess it's worth it...) But I paid about 15 bucks for that album. Actually I first heard it for free on a tape my friend Christina made for me (Wow does that mean I'm old??). Then I went out and bought it.

They are also selling a special box set, with booklets and vinyl and all sorts of good stuff on it. It seems tempting. What I may do is download the mp3s for 5 bucks or something, and if it is as amazing as everyone knows it will be, then I'll spring the 50 bucks or so for the box. Damn you Radiohead!

I don't really know what to make of the new season of The Family Guy. The season premier (the Star Wars parody was really good, but I noticed several scenes where the momentum seemed to die, and the insane, ever-present punchlines just didn't come. In the last episode from Sunday, titled Movin out (Brian's Song) (a characteristic FG triple-entendre), this was much more striking. I'm a huge fan, I consider it one of my top shows along with Lost, BSG, and It's Always Sunny. I have defended its humor whenever I get a chance - they don't need to rely on plot like South Park and The Simpsons. It is slapstick. Plot didn't really matter in the comedy classic Airplane and it needn't in FG.

But something very different is going on and I think it is intentional. This episode had several scenes that ended without punchlines, not with failed punchlines (every episode has a couple, I accept it), but literally the scenes just ended. Some were meant to be sad, some meant to be awkward (I think...), but some just... ended. Very strange.

Notably, there were the extended scenes with Carl, played by H. Jon Benjamin from Home Movies and Dr. Katz (as well as numerous cameos on almost every Adult Swim cartoon). Those scenes in particular seemed to draw inspiration from the bone-dry humor in those shows. I like that humor, in Home Movies particularly, but that has never really been FG's selling point. I relish those mundane, realist conversations that flavor and temper the off-the-wall humor in FG, but trying to build a show on that sort of banter is fundamentally changing the show. I dug those awkward movie conversations between Chris and Carl, but you need the fast-paced slapstick humor and offensive one-liners to give those mundane scenes any sort of weight. In a well-balanced episode, those scenes prove to be more tense than the ones that end up causing controversy.

I'm not ready to admit that FG has gone astray yet, I mean I tolerated the Nikki and Paolo episodes in the third season of Lost, but they need to get their balance back. In almost every episode, season 3 and after, I have had at least a couple moments where I could not control my laughter. I don't think I had one audible after viewing this episode.

And I sure as hell cherish my laughing time.

Freakin' awesome. Ableton, the company that makes the software with which I make pretty much all of my music, has just announced their new version of Live and has begun limited beta-testing (including your's truly). So far it looks mainly like an answer to many of the requests that users have been itching for on the Ableton Forum: mixed time-signatures, updated automation, better drum sequencing, better effects (visualized compression yay!). I have yet to see ways in which the program has been revolutionized, such as with Version 6's Rack feature, although several new features look very promising.

The best new feature, as far as I can tell, is the new Drum Rack which seems to crush any need for the now antiquated Impulse drum machine (I'm sure there will still be some quaint ways to utilize it). Drum Rack seems somewhat modeled on Battery from Native Instruments, which after messing with for a bit, used to make me return to my little Impulse with a shrug. You can now map drums, or any other sample or software instrument for that matter, to a midi note (shown in a neat little MPC-like visual. Each mapped note can be clicked on for editing either the audio sample (in a Simpler-like box) or the MIDI instrument. You can also add individual effects to each sound and incorporate subsequent racks to create a literally infinite sound chain. For those of us who make beat-oriented music, this is huge. Each signal also has its own mixer controls so that you can monitor and control panning and volume in the session view.

There are also several new soft-synths: an analog-modeling synth, an electric piano modeler, and a string synth. I've tinkered with the first two and, since I've been increasingly using synth and keys in my tunes, I'll likely end up buying them. They get a unique sound that is very distinct from Operator.

The beta seems a little slow and buggy, but that could just be my busted-ass Powerbook, which is terminally on the fritz.

I was hoping for some earth-shattering new feature, possibly involving the Cycling 74 partnership, but looks like we may have to wait a bit (hopefully they are just holding the surprise!).

Beautiful, I love it. Now if there were only some way to get it through peoples' heads that drenching yourself in perfume/cologne before getting on the subway is so incredibly rude. I routinely have to change cars while on the subway because someone felt the need to cover the musty subway stank with their chemical scent juice. Hey, I'm used to the subway stank. I can handle it. But perfume-so-thick-I-can-almost-feel-it drives my allergies insane! Not to mention the faux-pas of wearing it during a concert. I swear to god anytime I play a gig with a choir (more so with youth/community choirs) I have to forgo the use of my nose for the next hour or two, bla!